This struck a chord with me because I know that, just like everyone else, I have felt this before. I apologize for the anecdotes I tend to give as I reply, but I feel that it is because of my past that I can express what I have to say.
Having always been a morbid little kid, adults noticed of course. As a kid, I took fascination in dead animals, anatomically gross things, and horror films. I never wanted to hurt animals, I never aimed to hurt humans, and I never wished that what occurred in horror films would happen to someone else. I did notice kids found me strange for it. By then I had already declared myself a lone being. I figured no one, not including my family, would love me because I felt weird. I was in the fifth grade, and in retrospect, it makes me glum to know that at such a young age I was already branding myself something unlovable. One day, my math teacher looked at me and told me I should be a forensic scientist. “They love all of those strange things you like,” she told me. I remember everything down to the clothes of that day. I began realizing that there are people out there that share similar tastes as I do. I later on began to feel less lonely.
Often we declare ourselves unlovable because we find a particular characteristic of ours to not comply with the norm.
"No one will love me because I am overweight."
"No one will love me because I am mentally ill."
"No one will love me because I am too shy."
You forgot this world is massive and strange, and that we all have separate tastes and dislikes, and that you most certainly fit with someones likes.
I have loved people that are ill, people with odd habits, people with characteristics that I guess others don’t find normal or healthy. In each case, they found themselves unlovable, and in the end, even if it was me, they were proved wrong.
I hope someone proves you wrong.
Anonymous: Andy i feel like no one will ever love me